Blogging Elul #6 & 7 – Do & Be

Blogging Elul

I’m cheating a bit and putting Do and Be together because I find that those two things are always fighting within me a bit. My first thought when I saw these words juxtaposed was, “I am a human being, not a human doing.” This is something that I have to repeat often to myself because I can be a bit of a workaholic and tend to find my value in what I do rather than in who I am. Also comes from being a musician with a performance-based self esteem. In my younger days when I wanted to escape emotional difficulty, I would DO.

I can be impatient with introspection, or what I sometimes can interpret as navel-gazing. I’m all about taking time to contemplate, but there is a time to be and a time to do. My time to do sometimes comes quicker than others. Perhaps the grace is learning to balance the being and the doing is to honor the timing that feels right to me and honor the timing that feels right to others.

When I take time to BE, I’m all there is. There is no distraction, no noise, no performance, no effort. In that way, when I come to the end of myself, and it’s just me and God, we are alike in that We Are. I am. What I love about the Hebrew word for God’s name (and about the whole language) is that there are so many possible meanings for every word. There are pages and pages of possible meanings for God’s name. My favorite is I am Becoming Who I Am Becoming. God is, was, will be, and is becoming. This is one of many ways we are in the image of God. We are but we are also not yet, and in the present moment, we can BE.